smorgasbord

can i just say that’s such a fun word??  go ahead- say it out loud.    i now remember that word is in a disney movie…. which was it?  beauty & the beast?   i love when fun words are also in lyrics.

i digress……..

this will be a smorgasbord of topics.  no good title to fit it; a smattering.  odds & ends. whatever.

The Mr. is the clever one.  I feel like as I get bigger I get less funny!  But i know some of you are reading this to know how things are going.  we leave the humor to dad. 

in a nutshell (& the reason why there isn’t a post every day) i/we’re doing great.  i definitely have a pregnant belly.  so i’m growing.  i can’t imagine being 3 months bigger!  (course i couldn’t really imagine being this big, either)

i am starting my 3rd trimester today.  (!!!!???!!!!)  ok.  say that with me:  (!!!!???!!!!) 

i know i’ve mentioned wanting to feel little bean.  s/he’s a good listener b/c i am.  even The Mr. can enjoy the kicks and things.  he likes to listento LB.  says it sounds funny to hear baby move.  in case you didn’t catch it from before, LB has even kicked daddy!  that was hilarious. i think we both just stared at each other cracking up.  i mean- what else couldja do?

we all enjoyed a fantastic easter.  we appreciate Little Bean’s gramma & grampa very much for the gifts!  LB now has a place to sleep….  a beautiful crib that fits well and looks perfect in the nursery.  But the importantthing (according to grampa) is the bike trailer he bought ben for his birthday!  and it’s big enough that i’m sure LB could sleep in that as well. 

between the crib and the glider that aunt jo-jo & aunt kelly lent us—-  that kid will be very prepared to sleep.

we have an understanding.  mommy likes to sleep.  Little Bean is living in mommy (therefore learning from her) so LB will also enjoy sleeping in!  that IS how it works, right?  The Mr. thinks i should be able to talk to baby telepathically.  you know, since we’re connected and all.  so surely it will develop sleeping patterns from me. (and please not daddy!!!  who else in this world can hear cat paws on carpet????)

so, we’re all doing well.  we have a dr’s appt on tuesday.  hopefully there will not be any april fool’s jokes goin’ on. 

guess that about wraps up things to share. thanks for reading!

Childrens Book Review Time

We’re planning on having a bookshelf in the baby’s room, complete with a bunch of childrens books.  Mpotter accumulated a king’s ransom of childrens books being a first grade teacher.  Here is a sampling of a few that will be in the collection.

The Story About Ping
By Marjorie Flack and Kurt Wiese
This is one of my favorite children’s books.  This Chinese duck named Ping and his 42 cousins all live on this slave ship in the Yangtze River.  The slave master of the boat threatens all of the ducks with abuse if they are the last one on the boat at the end of the day.  One day Ping can’t take the stress of being the last one on the boat any more, panics, and doesn’t get on the boat at all.  Ping ends up getting lost and almost killed and eaten in the next few pages.  Realizing his mistake, Ping eventually finds the boat and returns to a life of slavery.  The story ends with Ping getting beaten by the slave master.

I’m not sure why I liked this book so much.  Life for Ping just sucks on and off the boat.  Am I going to read it to the baby?  Hells yeah!

Sylvester and the Magic Pebble
By William Stieg
This talking donkey named Sylvester lives the idyllic life in a small country town.  That is until he finds this magic pebble that grants any wish he says or thinks.  The rub is that he has to be touching the pebble for the wish to take effect.  Before he can take advantage of this miraculous find, a lion comes and threatens to eat Sylvester.  I didn’t even know lions even ate donkeys.  Anyways, Sylvester panics and wishes himself into a rock to avoid the lion.  Unable to hold onto the pebble any more, he can’t wish himself back into a donkey.  Talk about irony!  His parents then panic and invoke the help of the local police (who happen to be pigs – ha!).  Nobody can find Sylvester and his parents fall into a deep depression.  Sylvester also becomes depressed, and maintains stasis as a rock for about a year.  His parents then try to take their mind off of suicidal thoughts and decide to have picnic.  By the sheer stroke of luck, they picnic on the rock that is Sylvester and find the pebble and wish Sylvester was with them.  Sylvester then is returned to normal and everyone is happy in the end.

I loved this book as a kid.  But it wasn’t until I re-read the book years later that I gained a new appreciation for it as an allegory of drug abuse and it’s effects on family life.  The red pebble = LSD.  The book was written in the 60s.  The cops are pigs.  How much more obvious does it need to get?    

Are You My Mother?
By P.D. Eastman
This single mother bird with good intentions leaves her egg, I think to get food or something for the baby bird when it hatches.  Well, the baby bird hatches while the mother is gone.  The bird panics when it’s mother isn’t there and leaves the nest in search of it’s mother.  Since it has no idea what it’s mother looks like, he asks every blessed thing it comes into contact with – cat, dog, and few other things I can’t remember.  I do remember that the baby bird came very close to having a very short life with it’s naivety and general lack of survival instinct.  Anyways, since it’s a childrens book and has to end happily (Ping being the exception), the baby bird ends up finding it’s mother by the end of the book.

In case you haven’t realized it by now, apparently I’m drawn to children’s books whose themes center around desperation, solitude, and panic.  This book has it all.
 

The Cat in the Hat
By Dr. Seuss
Basically this Cat barges into these two kids’ house and totally f**ks the place up. These two kids just stare in disbelief as this Cat wrecks havoc with his two minions, Thing 1 and Thing 2. In the end the Cat ends up cleaning up the joint, I guess because he realizes he’ll probably go to jail for such reckless and unprovoked behavior.  Dr. Seuss was probably finishing up the book and said “What sounds better as a sequel?  The Cat in the Hat Comes Back or The Cat in the Hat Charged with Domestic Attack“.  Obviously he chose the former.

I’m not sure why this book is so popular.  The Cat has no respect for personal property.  And these two small kids are left alone with no supervision, unless maybe the fish is supposed to be the babysitter.  But I can’t see Child Services buying that one.  Apologies to all Dr. Seuss fans, but this book just doesn’t sit well with me. 

who’s your daddy?

so, little bean…  do you sometimes wonder who that is w/ the deep voice that hangs around all the time?  do you wonder about who it was you kicked (!) on Saturday?  do you wonder who that was that you moved while he played soccer?

tho’ your daddy somehow duped meemaw into thinking he’s “mr. romantic”, let me assure you he’s not.  however, he is thoughtful & extremely helpful.  you’ll see very soon that he’s pretty funny.  sometimes too funny.  (don’t expect any serious answers to come from him!)

he’s the kind of man who will let me cheer loudly when clemson makes it into the finals of the ACC basketball tournament for the first time since the 60s.  he’ll cheer w/ me. but i’m always the loudest! 

he’s a man who let’s me entertain, even tho he would rather just have a quiet night at home.  he’s a man who enjoys my paprikas (as will you, i’m sure) and doesn’t mind doing the pots & pans after i make a mess in the kitchen over said paprikas.  he’s a man who likes the challenge of stacking said dishes in the drainer… all at once.  as high as it goes!

 

he will complain & carry on when i want to eat in the dining room.  but then he doesn’t mind washing (and drying) the china as well.

he’s the man who comes to my rescue anytime he feels we need it.  he worries about how we’re feeling in the day, and always asks how our day was.  if i felt you.  if we’re ok.

he’s the one you hear laughing really hard at some silly shows like “always sunny in philadelphia”.  he gets stressed out by LOST, and laughs like a 10 year old to America’s funniest videos.

he’s the one who lets me sleep late & takes care of the “kittens”.  he’s the one who has only slept till 8 twice this past year.  he likes to talk about how these things “build character” (he’s got quite a lot of character).   how many times has he traipsed through the woods and climbed trees so i wouldn’t worry about losing yiminy?

he will do anything to make us happy.  remember that one time i said that lemonade would taste good & he grabbed his shoes and left?   

watch out, tho’- because he can’t wait till you start doing all the chores with (and then FOR) him.  he likes to tell you that you’re coming out punished.   (um, don’t worry b/c he’s the one who lets me wear the pants.)

he’s the one that is extremely excited to meet you.  he’s jealous b/c i get to spend all my time with you.  [that's why we're very happy you kicked him last night.  he wants to be a part of this].  he’s the man who keeps telling me that i can “have the night off” so he can take care of you & wake up with you. 

he is beside himself to know that you’ll be here soon- before we know it.

be good to your daddy.  he’s the best man i know!

PS- all he wants is a lap cat.  the 2 we have do not meet that description. we hope you will enjoy all the cuddling he wants to do!

there’s a fundus amungus

i can’t get that phrase outta my head!  ever since i read it in a book or email earlier on in my pregnancy….    i dedicate this titled post to my brother Danny, who would mention the fungus among us anytime he could (mushrooms, anyone?)

i think most everyone reading this blog has had a child already, so you know about the fundus.  for the maybe 2 of you—- that’s where they measure your belly. 

i was excited to finally have it measured yesterday…. since that phrase has run thru my head.  and i’m happy that it’s right on target!  23cm for 22+ weeks.

i was more excited to hear the heartbeat yesterday.  it’s been a month…  and that’s the proof i have that little bean is growing inside.  Heather said heartbeat sounded good & strong.  which was a relief to me. 

i wouldn’t say i’ve been worried or stressed, but definitely preoccupied by the fact that i am still not feeling LB in any consistent way.  i felt it a looong time ago. then not for a good while.  then it started to be more regular.  & as soon as i found a pattern, it didn’t come again.  i know that i will be complaining about too much movement soon enough- so i don’t want to rush things.  but it’s the only connection i have w/ this little bean living inside of me.  it’s the only way i know LB is saying “hi”.

Heather reassured us that it’s normal…  at about 28 weeks i can expect consistent movement.  ok. don’t wanna rush it.

there’s lots to prepare for.  we were on a roll for about a month or so.  but now w/ work picking up so much for me, it was quite difficult even finding time for a childbirth class!  and i had several weekends to choose from.

we’re more than half-baked.  i wish i had posted on week 20. i also wanted to eat half-baked ice cream (yum) but my mother-in-law made us dessert when we were in greenville.  brownies w/ vanilla ice cream (yum!).

sadly, we comment on how quickly this is going. i know it’s just gonna get quicker.  i’m enjoying what i can….              i still have been quite lucky.  all’s well so far! 

Too Many Words

Did you know that there are tons of books out there to help one prepare to have a baby?  Me neither.   Anyways, we have a bunch of them on the coffee table, which is in front of the TV.  So TV usually wins out instead of reading the proper literature in preparation for this occasion.  Even if the TV was broken for some reason, I’m not sure if I’d read them – I looked in one once and there are too many words inside.  I’d also be busy getting a new TV.

However, I’m trying to be a responsible expected father, so I think I can accomplish this by renting a few movies.  After a quick IMDB search on the subject, the following movies have been added to our Netflix queue and I should be adequately prepared after a few hours in front of the TV:

• She’s Having a Baby 
• Three Men and a Baby
• Superbabies: Baby Geniuses 2
• Rosemary’s Baby
• Million Dollar Baby
• Dirty Dancing (Jennifer Grey’s character is named Baby)